Is she not ready for a relationship? Or are YOU not ready for
a relationship?
Right now, there are over 3.5 billion women in the world. 2
billion of them are between 24-54 years old. Let’s assume half of them are
single.
That leaves 1 billion women who – based on my experience –
are actively looking to meet a man or are open to it. So why then are you
struggling to meet ONE?
Why is it that you can’t find a girl?
Why do you go on dates and put in all this effort… but still
aren’t getting anywhere?
There are 7 reasons why and Renee Slansky from The
Attractive Man team is here to tell you what those 7 fatal reasons are,
and exactly how to turn them around.
1: You
don’t know what you want
If you are out there dating and trying to have a relationship
and have absolutely no idea, or a really vague idea of what you want, then it’s
going to be a very confusing process for everyone involved.
Think of love like a map. In order to set a course, you have
to know where you are and where you want to get to. This is what gives you a
point of direction to work towards.
If you don’t have a sense of direction, you’ll just aimlessly
wander around from girl to girl and never actually get anywhere.
Here’s what I want you to do: I want you to sit down, grab a
piece of paper and actually write down WHAT YOU WANT! List the top 5 qualities
in your dream girl and dream relationship and then ask yourself, how can I make
that a reality? Do you want a long-term
or casual relationship? Because identifying what type of relationship you want
will help you work out what qualities that girl will have that can give you
that type of relationship.
Do you need to be more proactive? Do you need to do some work
on yourself? Do you have any idea where this type of girl might hang out?
The clearer you are the more chances you’ll have of
attracting her and recognizing her when she comes along.
2: You need
to sort out your baggage
Let’s be adults now and understand that no one is coming to
rescue us and that we are actually the common denominator in our lives. If you
are struggling to hold a girl or find a girl then it could be because you need
to sort your crap out!
A high value awesome woman isn’t going to put up with a guy
that still lets his past get him down. Stop making excuses and do something
about what you are bitter or angry about.
Having a great relationship is about being a great partner
who doesn’t hold onto unnecessary destructive crap.
I want you to do something: I want you imagine grabbing a
suitcase and load it up with 10 or 20 kgs of weight, then I want you to take it
on every date with you and try to meet women….
pretty sure women are going to run a mile ….
Well that’s what having baggage is like…it repels the right
people from our life and attracts the ones who also have unresolved baggage.
So here’s what you need to do to get rid of it: Write a list of all the people who hurt you,
list what they did, speak forgiveness over them and yourself out loud for each
person: which is something as simple as “I Rob… forgive you Jane for breaking
my heart and hurting me in 2010, I release you and myself from this experience”
.
Then burn that list. It might seem stupid, but hey I’m the
coach and I actually know what works, so try it for me.
Remember you can’t correct what you aren’t willing to
confront.
3: Choose
commitment.
I will say this, you aren’t alone and it is more common for
men to fear commitment than women, but just because you are in company doesn’t
mean it’s going to justify your fears or that it’s good company!
It’s time to grow up and realise that commitment is not a
prison sentence, it’s an opportunity to be loved wholly by someone and open
your heart to another who can actually enhance it.
Statistically speaking, married men actually live longer and
have less stress, because they understand that a problem shared is a problem
halved!
There will always be risk involved but you get to choose how
you respond to life. So, try and just take commitment in baby steps instead of
being scared away from the big picture.
And ask yourself where does this fear come from, is there
baggage from point number 2 you need to sort out?
4: You’re
dating the wrong woman over and over again!
If you have a type that’s a great starting point, but just
make sure it’s women who are also good for you.
You see you can’t choose who you are attracted to, but you
can choose who to fall in love with. Not
all women are money hungry, blood sucking, heartbreakers (shock horror I know!)
But you have to weed out the good from the bad and learn to
identify them early on. Make sure when
you are attracted to a woman that you are taking your time to get to know her,
look at what she’s consistent in, and ask yourself if she has more than just looks
and sexual attraction going for her.
One thing I get my clients to do is an ex mug line up
…basically I want you to profile all your exs and previous dates and see what
common qualities and similarities they all have. Then trace back what could be
indications of these such as her looks, way to act, dress, her friends etc.
Then once you have an idea, you will be able to pick up on it
before it’s too late!
5: You’re
not making room for anyone in your life
If you want someone to fit in, then you have to make them
feel like they have a place. I get it, you want to have all your ducks lined up
in a row, but if you keep delaying because you don’t feel ready, you’ll keep
missing out and losing more time.
It’s not about trying to squeeze her in when you finally have
everything perfect, you can still have a relationship even while everything
else is in progress.
So, here’s what I want you to do. I want you to set 1–2
nights a week free where you would eventually want to spend quality time with
her. Right now, she’s not in your life, but it’s about getting prepared and in
a positive routine to receive her. Dedicate these two nights to either
proactively trying to get a date, by being social or interacting with women or
doing something fun.
Next, I want you to clear a space in your bathroom for her…
yep when she eventually comes you will already have a space for her to fit
in! Also, this physical reminder will
keep you accountable to what you want and need to do as well to get it.
6: Your
standards are too high or too low
Guys, get to know what a healthy and realistic standard is.
Stop guessing or basing it off your past experiences and get educated.
If your standards are too low you will always be disappointed
and unfulfilled. But, if they are too high, then women will never feel like
they can please you and you will end up alone. The two indications of a healthy
relationship are peace and progress. If you don’t have either then you are
either too high or too low!
7: You
don’t have a clue about women!
Ok lastly this is a pretty big one. If you don’t know a thing
about women then we aren’t going to feel like you add value to us. This is why
you have to subscribe to our channel, because we literally give all the juicy
details away.
Guys women aren’t that complicated. We teach you how to talk
to them and woo them, so if you haven’t downloaded one of our escalation cheat
sheets then do so now.
Here’s the thing, a lot of the time all we want is to feel
like a priority, have some security and know that you think we are beautiful
and valued. It’s that simple.
If you want to know how we tick you have to get inside our
heads and hearts! Make the effort to invest getting to know how we tick, what
we feel and want, because it’s actually going to be to your own advantage, plus
you’ll make up for lost time and set yourself apart from every other man out
there.
Well that was a lesson and a half and pretty darn good, so do
me a favour and share it with a mate and give us a thumbs up!
